Friday, November 13, 2009
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Monday, November 9, 2009
Gubbmint and How Gubbmint Works
Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert. Congress said, "Someone may steal from it at night." So they created a night watchman position and hired a person for the job.
Then Congress said, "How does the w atchman do his job without
instruction?" So they created a planning department and hired two
people, one person to write the instructions, and one person to do
time studies.
Then Congress said, "How will we know the night watchman is doing the
tasks correctly?" So they created a Quality Control department and
hired two people. One to do the studies and one to write the reports..
Then Congress said, "How are these people going to get paid?" So They
created the following positions, a time keeper, and a payroll officer,
Then hired two people.
Then Congress said, "Who will be accountable for all of these people?"
So they created an administrative section and hired three people, an
Administrative Officer, Assistant Administrative Officer, and a Legal
Secretary.
Then Congress said, "We have had this command in operation for one
Year and we are $18,000 over budget, we must cutback overall cost."
So they laid off the night watchman.
NOW slowly, let it sink in.
Quietly, we go like sheep to slaughter.
Does anybody remember the reason given for the establishment of
the DEPARTMENT OF ENERGY.... during the Carter Administration?
Anybody?
Anything?
No?
Didn't think so!
Bottom line. We've spent several hundred billion dollars in support of
an agency...the reason for which not one person who reads this can remember!
Ready??
It was very simple...and at the time, everybody thought it very appropriate.
The Department of Energy was instituted on 8-04-1977.
TO LESSEN OUR DEPENDENCE ON FOREIGN OIL.
Hey, pretty efficient, huh???
AND NOW IT'S 2009 -- 32 YEARS LATER -- AND THE BUDGET FOR THIS "NECESSARY" DEPARTMENT IS AT $24.2 BILLION A YEAR. THEY HAVE 16,000 FEDERAL EMPLOYEES AND APPROXIMATELY 100,000 CONTRACT EMPLOYEES; AND LOOK AT THE JOB THEY HAVE DONE! THIS IS WHERE YOU SLAP YOUR FOREHEAD AND SAY, "WHAT WAS I THINKING?"
Ah, yes -- good ole bureaucracy.
AND, NOW, WE ARE GOING TO TURN THE BANKING SYSTEM, HEALTH CARE, AND THE AUTO INDUSTRY OVER TO THE SAME GOVERNMENT?
HELLOOO! Anybody Home?
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Friday, November 6, 2009
Friday, October 30, 2009
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Friday, October 23, 2009
The Obama Family Portrait.
The Obama Family Portrait. By Kate Phillips. The Obama family portrait, released by the White House. Annie Leibovitz, via the White House The Obama family portrait, released by the White House.
Related searches:
obama official portrait, first family photo, obama family photo, obama family pictures, obama family
Thursday, October 22, 2009
What Does Pussy Taste Like
"Lemony."
"Like the ocean."
"Cheerios."
"Have you ever put your tongue on the end of a battery? Like an alkaline battery."
"Like electricity, when you put a pop top from a soda can between your braces."
"Tangy."
"Like semen (salty), but better. Zesty."
"Tastes like glass."
"Whipped bananas and ginger ale."
"Similar to licking a non-bleeding wound. Sort of a salty, musty, yet sweet taste. It varies."
"Honestly I don't remember the taste. The smell was all I could think about."
"A little fishy in taste, but that could be related to the smell."
"Depending on the woman and the time of the month, there can be a slight non-salty blood taste or a tangy battery taste."
"Bitter."
"While performing oral sex on a college girlfriend, a few drops of a tepid, vaginal secretion were produced during her orgasm. When I tasted this fluid, I had the unusual sensation of eating a taco. That's right! It was salty and tasted just like the combined flavors of fried hamburger meat, cheese, corn shell, and El Paso taco sauce! I'll always have some very fond memories whenever I eat Mexican."
"Vaginal fluids are tangy, and syrupy, at least the ones I've come across. (!) If I haven't tasted and she hasn't BEEN tasted in a while, the fluids are especially tangy, but they always have a wonderful sweet smell. Kind of paradoxical, tangy-tasting and sweet-smelling, but that's part of why it's so much fun."
"It's not so much a taste, it's a smell. Kind of like a musty armpit but not really as offensive. Actually it might taste like a musty armpit too, I'll have to check it and get back to you."
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